Iterations

I don’t think it’s much of a stretch to say that I’ve experienced my fair share of loss over the past 59 years, and each time the wound is reopened so it never really gets a chance to heal. I would even say that grief and loss have become recurring characters in my life, rather than just a single episode walk-on in season 2 — sort of like The Smoking Man from The X-Files. I know that loss will show up again and again, so it’s not really even much of a surprise anymore. I don’t want to sound like I’m minimizing it or that I’m comfortable with the arrangement — because as I said, each new loss still hurts — but over the past decade, I’ve been working on carving out a different relationship with it. CONNECT WITH ME Visit my Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Get my Newsletter: Subscribe Email me: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com

For the better part of a year-and-a-half now, the Supernote Manta has been my daily driver when it comes to writing. Whether I’m journaling, starting a new edition of my newsletter, or simply capturing thoughts and ideas to flesh out later, the Manta is where nearly all of my writing begins. CONNECT WITH ME Visit my Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Get my Newsletter: Subscribe Email me: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com

I’ve always thought of archives as places where things go when they’re finished. Sort of a record of the past or a cold storage collection of what mattered after the fact. But lately, I’ve started to think of an archive differently. Maybe it isn’t just a repository for things that stop being useful. Maybe it’s also where they start asking new questions. A few weeks ago, I picked up a scanner, which I wrote about in a previous Iteration. Since then, I’ve been scanning all sorts of things without much of a plan. Things like magazine covers, vintage ephemera, and old photographs. I’m not looking for anything in particular, I’m just following my curiosity and trusting that some of these pieces might surface later. Over the last few newsletters, I’ve tried to explore different ways of paying attention. For example, the camera says: “Pay attention to this moment.” The scanner says: “Look closer. There is more here than you thought.” I think the archive says: “Now sit with what you found long enough for it to tell…

So there I was, looking through stacks of receivers, DVD players, and the odd VCR when I spotted something I didn’t recognize. It was big — big enough to cover nearly two receivers. A CD player was sitting on top of it and when I lifted it off, I think I actually gasped, which Adrianne says is a sure sign that you’ve found something good. It was a flatbed scanner made by a company called Viisan, a brand I’d never actually heard of. Epson? Sure. HP? Of course. Microtek? Absolutely. Viisan? Not so much. And like I said, it was big. Most flatbed scanners are letter or legal-sized, but this one was A3, which means it can scan tabloid-sized magazines like my old issues of LIFE and Look in one pass. LINKS Goodwill Homer Laughlin china Broyhill Brasilia side table Sansui 9090 Marantz 2270 Viisan LIFE Look Affinity Print Size Calculator CONNECT WITH ME Visit my Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Get my Newsletter: Subscribe Email me: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com

When I was a kid, the camera only came out for special occasions. A single roll of film might last months, sometimes longer. Most of the time the camera lived in a cupboard until there was a reason to bring it out. Birthdays. Christmas. Vacations. Graduations. Film wasn’t something you wasted, so every frame had to justify itself. Back then, the camera itself felt almost mysterious. My father loved machines of every kind, especially engines, and while I didn’t inherit his expertise, through him I became fascinated by how things worked. But a camera seemed different. It wasn’t just a machine. Somehow, it could stop time. It could preserve a moment long after the moment had passed. I didn’t understand how it worked at the time, only that it felt capable of something almost magical. What’s your instrument? What do you find yourself noticing? How does that curiosity find its way into your work — or your life? I’d love to hear from you. Email me at talkback@jefferysaddoris.com. LINKS YashicaMat 124G William…

I've built more personal websites than I care to count, starting with my first one back in 1997. For years, the goal was simple — keep it fresh, keep it updated, keep the portfolio current enough to land the next job. I picked that habit up partly from Jakob Nielsen, the usability researcher who was convinced sites needed to feel alive to repeat visitors, and I ran with it — random hero images in early Javascript, the same trick later in ActionScript when Flash took over, even a menu I built as a cloth simulation in LightWave 3D for a site about Western furniture I designed with my dad. This time around, I'm talking about what changed. My last major site overhaul was the move to Carrd back in 2021, and the WordPress redesign I've been slow-walking for months isn't slow because I'm stuck — it's slow because the urgency that used to drive it just isn't there anymore. I'm not trying to convince anyone to hire me. I'm not chasing what's current. I'm more interested now in curating and archiving the work I've…

"We're not geniuses, we're just regular guys who are interested in things." — Neil Peart On August 1st, 2015, Rush played their final show at the Forum in LA. I was there, just as I had been for so many Rush shows over the years. That show felt different — special in a way that we weren’t really prepared for. For months leading up to it, there were rumors that this would be the last show and after the final encore of “Working Man,” when Neil came out from behind his drum kit to take a bow with Alex and Geddy, the rumors became true. Over 40 years and thousands of shows, Neil never took a bow out front — instead, he just put down his sticks and quietly left the stage. As he wrote in “Limelight,” he simply couldn’t pretend a stranger was a long-awaited friend. I've been following a thread for over 40 years that started with a borrowed Rush record and led me to books, ideas, and work I couldn't have predicted. This iteration is about where that thread goes when you really pull it. LINKS Rush Rush live 6/7/26 in…

For most of my life, I’ve been trying to reconcile two very different ideas about success. One was rooted in practicality, achievement, and outcomes. The other was rooted in curiosity, learning, and exploration. In this episode, I look back at a question my mother asked me during my senior year of high school, the unexpected lessons hidden in a lifetime of creative work, and why I’ve come to realize that what I wanted was never really a career at all. It was a way of living. CONNECT WITH ME Visit my Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Get my Newsletter: Subscribe Email me: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com

"Sometimes the thing you’re skilled at needs to be broken a little before it can surprise you again." For the past several years, I’ve primarily identified as a painter, despite the fact that the most consistent work I’ve done is writing. That said, lately I’ve had the uncomfortable thought that I might not want to paint anymore — at least not the way I’ve been doing it. Not because I’ve lost interest entirely, but maybe because I haven’t lost it enough. I can pretty consistently make paintings that “work” on some level, and, honestly, that might be part of the problem. CONNECT WITH ME Visit my Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Get my Newsletter: Subscribe Email me: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com

Lately I’ve been feeling the weight of how complicated everything seems — I even wrote a bit about it in the last Iteration. It seems that the scale of it all — the speed, the certainty, the volume — can often make even small efforts feel almost invisible. I’ve caught myself wondering whether the things that I make or the conversations I have matter in any “real” way, and honestly, that unsettles me. And I suspect I’m not the only one who’s felt that. CONNECT WITH ME Visit my Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Get my Newsletter: Subscribe Email me: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com

Towards the end of last year, I started thinking about building a new website for myself. Not just another vanity site (although I’ve built plenty of those), but more of an archive of the various things I’ve done over my career and a hub where I can share stories around what I’m thinking about and what I’m working on that aren’t dependent on The Algorithm. After years of inconsistent, and if I’m being honest, fairly half-hearted efforts to play the social media game, I’m finally done. I have no more interest in chasing likes or followers or the ever-elusive “brand deal.” I just want to make stuff in my quiet little studio and write about what I make — but also, and maybe more importantly, about what others are making, doing, and thinking about. In fact, in many ways, I kind of want my making to be a byproduct of what others are making, and maybe that includes you. CONNECT WITH ME Visit my Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Get my Newsletter: Subscribe Email me: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com

About 18 months ago, I started seeing a therapist. I had gotten to a place that I’ve only really been once before and Adrianne encouraged me — actually, she implored me — to talk with a therapist. She once said to me, “Every day, I’m terrified that I’m either going to come home and not find you, or worse, that I will.” I’m not going to lie, that hit pretty hard. I knew I was in a dark place, but we often think that we are the only ones who know just how bad it really is — that we are somehow hiding it from the rest of the world. It’s not true, of course, but that was me in that moment, and to hear the person I love the most in the world say that to me…let’s just say that it shone a light on the dark that I felt surrounded by. So for the past year and a half, I’ve been having the sessions and doing the deep work of unlearning what I had learned and letting go of some of the limiting beliefs and behaviors that have seemed so hell bent on keeping me out of the light. CONNECT WITH ME Visit my Website:…

It took a bit to fire up, but once it did, the familiar rumble of my Dad’s 1974 Ford F100 took me right back to my childhood summers. As Art slowly backed the truck off of the trailer, Adrianne commented, “It’s smaller than I thought it would be, given how large it looms in your history.” Indeed, I thought. One of my earliest memories of this truck is of waking up on the bench seat at Buckskin State Park on the Arizona side of the Colorado river. It was cold that morning — though it was light, the sun hadn’t yet crested the red rock hills that bordered the campground to the East. Dad and my stepmother Linda were both awake after having spent the night in sleeping bags in the bed of the truck. Dad had made a small fire that was crackling and popping and I remember the faint smell of coffee on the chilly morning air. CONNECT WITH ME Visit my Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Get my Newsletter: Subscribe Email me: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com

I’ve shared this story before, and regardless of whether it’s true or just the stuff of photographic legend, it’s so good that I think it bears repeating every so often. The story goes that a photographer was presenting his portfolio to the great Jay Maisel. He asked Jay how he could take more interesting pictures, to which Jay immediately replied, “become a more interesting person.” It may sound trite, but I think it’s often easy for makers to become myopic in terms of the types of things that inspire them. Painters are often looking at other painters, photographers look at other photographers, musicians are often listening to other musicians, and so on. If you’re always looking (or listening) to what’s familiar, the odds of you arriving at something that’s unfamiliar (even if it’s only unfamiliar to you), are pretty slim, which is why it can be helpful to look outside of your comfort zone for inspiration. I’m interested in almost everything so as you might imagine, my feeds are pretty eclectic. While I’ve…

For a long time now — years, in fact — I’ve leaned toward the belief that I deserve to be paid for the creative work I do. And to be clear, I don’t think that’s unreasonable, at least not from a certain point of view. After all, in a capitalist system that’s sort of how it works, right? You do a job, you earn money, you buy things. On the other side, goods and services cost money and we generally accept that premise. Cars, houses, a gallon of milk, a bucket of chicken — whatever it is, we accept that acquiring those things is transactional. I exchange the money I earn for the thing that you produce. The same goes for services like electricity, gas, your phone bill, or internet access. That’s just how the system works. But there are gray areas. Some types of goods and services seem to be more or less exempt from that agreement — namely creative ones. Music, movies, and software often fall into that bucket. And, to make it more personal, art. CONNECT WITH ME Visit my Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Get my…

Yesterday, I had a heart-wrenching experience. I was out for a morning walk with Adrianne and Cooper when I spotted a bird flailing in the grass under a tree. As I got closer, it struggled to escape, its life force fading away. When it finally stopped moving, I knelt down and tried to comfort it with a damp leaf (Adrianne advised against touching it directly due to the bird flu). Watching it die right before my eyes was incredibly painful. I still don’t know what happened, but it clearly had endured some serious trauma. Tears welled up in my eyes as I confessed to Adrianne, “I hate this.” She replied, “I know, but in its final moments, you showed it kindness and love.” A NOTE: I know this isn’t the usual fare for Iterations, but I think quiet moments like this can be just as important as the big existential ones. I have dozens of these types of vignettes — sometimes it’s just me taking notes on my life and the observations and feelings are just for me, but other times, like this one, I think they are worth…

Last week, I got a text message from my friend Michelle, who works at the National Gallery of Art. “Lunch tomorrow or Thursday?” followed by “Come see the movie in Little Beasts. It starts at the top of every hour. I would love to discuss it with you.” Not only was Michelle one of the first people I met when I first visited DC in 2014, since then, she’s become a close friend and the National Gallery has come to be my happy place in DC. In fact, some of the best art and photography shows I’ve ever seen, including Sally Mann: A Thousand Crossings (Catalog), Gordon Parks: The New Tide, 1940-1950 (Catalog), Outliers and American Vanguard Art (Catalog), The 70s Lens, and Mark Rothko: Paintings on Paper (Catalog), to name just a few, have all been at the National Gallery. I’ve also learned about artists I’d never heard of before, like Rachel Whiteread, Philip Guston, James Castle, and Elizabeth Catlett, among others. And in nearly every case, when I’ve had the chance to walk through a show with Michelle, through…

Whether it’s a sheet of old plywood resting on a couple of sawhorses or a fastidiously crafted hardwood masterpiece, the workbench has long been the centerpiece of studios, workshops, garages, and maker spaces of all kinds. Of the many standout features of our house, I think I was most excited about the multiple basement spaces that I would be able to use as studios for the different things I do. The previous owners were makers — she was a painter and he was a woodworker whose wood shop occupied one of the basement spaces. When we bought our house in 2016, I remember telling Adrianne that I wanted to make one of the spaces my paint studio and that I would make some benches “on day one.” Well, day one didn’t happen, nor did week one, month one, or year one. In fact, it’s taken me nearly nine years to finally build benches for my studio. So what happened? See the photos I reference in this episode on Substack: The Ballad of the Benches CONNECT WITH ME Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Instagram:…

The other day, I was going through my archive of work ahead of a website redesign, and I found a blog post that I wrote in 2014 that’s sort of an homage to my all-time favorite camera and how after finally acquiring one, I couldn’t bring myself to actually use it. Ten years later, I think the post is still relevant to how some photographers and artists have a tendency to fetishize the tools they use. I know that was me once. For what it’s worth, I think photography is unique in that, because it’s art and science, the potential proficiency of the craft often gets conflated with having the “right” gear. The irony is that it really is the purposeful practice of using our gear, whatever it is, that allows us to get better — to see better. I bought my first SLR in 1982 and I have enjoyed taking pictures ever since. Over the past 40+ years, I’ve used a bunch of different cameras and I’ve enjoyed almost all of them for different reasons. But the one thing that they have in common is the ability to look at the world…

I love making things, whether that means making a conversation with someone or making a piece of art or writing, and getting to do that fairly unfettered is a massive privilege and it’s not wasted on me. That said, it’s okay to be disappointed in what you make — and maybe not disappointed with the end product itself, but in the reception or how it gets received. It’s okay to be disappointed that other people don’t love it as much as you do — because you poured yourself into it, so of course you love it. But then when you release it into the world and the world just shrugs, it’s okay to be disappointed with that. CONNECT WITH ME Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Instagram: @jefferysaddoris Email: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com

NOTE: To see the photos that I reference in this episode, see the post on my Substack. On one of our recent morning walk and talks, a group of photographers and I were talking about how much worse Instagram has gotten over the past few years in terms of exposure and engagement. We all agreed that it seems like most photographers we’ve spoken to about it have very similar feedback. Subscribers, reach, and engagement are all a fraction of what they used to be. And the platform that was once all about sharing images no longer seems to care about images at all — instead they prioritize short-form video in a desperate attempt to compete with TikTok and YouTube. But in the process, I think the platform has lost its way and has just become a vapid mechanism to spoon-feed ads to users. To be clear, there are still a bunch of terrific artists and photographers on Instagram — which is the main reason I haven’t left — but that’s not what gets served up to me by the algorithm. Even the people I follow are in my feed…

Reinvention is tough. Disrupting old patterns of beliefs or behaviors is tough. Even when we finally decide to disrupt the flow of familiarity, the fear of the unknown that awaits us can be paralyzing. I know that it has been for me. But one of the things that my therapist routinely encourages me to do is to sit with discomfort — to force myself to pause and breathe and stave off the instinct to move into “fight or flight” mode. In sitting with the discomfort or the pain or fear, we reduce its power and we might be more able to move through it to whatever is waiting on the other side. For me, I think that’s the possibility of making more work that I find interesting, finding an audience that will value it, and becoming more connected with a broader community of artists and makers. LINKS Better Than Ezra Kevin Griffin From Better Than Ezra Advice On Songwriting Do schools kill creativity? | Sir Ken Robinson | TED Kevin Griffin (Wikipedia) The Greatest Song by Kevin Griffin CONNECT WITH ME Website:…

Yesterday, Adrianne and I went out to one of favorite little coffee shops to have breakfast and spend the morning working. About an hour in, I had this urge to check Instagram, which I rarely do, especially lately. In fact, I haven’t really done much online or on social media since the election — I actually leave my phone home more often than not — but for whatever reason, I stopped doing my Morning Pages and picked up my phone and checked Instagram. The first post I saw was a story from Wesley Verhoeve. It was a photo of my friend Pableaux Johnson with a caption that read, “Rest in peace, Pableaux Johnson. Beloved by so many, a true culture documentarian, and a New Orleans treasure.” I was stunned and, in the moment, I honestly didn’t understand what I was reading. My first instinct was to respond to Wesley with, “Wait what? Pableaux is a friend of ours. What is this news?” Wesley responded, “He passed away. I’m sorry to bring you this news. I discovered it this morning from various other posts.” After a…

I’ve held off on posting this Iteration because I just didn’t feel like it was that important in light of what’s happening in California. But after some reflection, I actually think that it is important, because art and making are still important. Hope is important. Helping people to feel just a little less alone and trying to connect with them wherever that may be is important and it’s what I try to do with these Iterations. I write about my thoughts and experiences in the hope that it may help you navigate your own. LINKS American Red Cross The Los Angeles Regional Food Bank The Animal Wellness Foundation The California Fire Foundation Dark Matter Labyrinth Blake Crouch Apple TV+ Texas Shakespeare Festival Alabama Shakespeare Festival CONNECT WITH ME Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Instagram: @jefferysaddoris Email: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com SUBSCRIBE Subscribe to Almost Everything with Jeffery Saddoris in your favorite podcast app. You can also subscribe to my newsletter on Substack.

I don’t know about you, but this is by far my least favorite time of year. It really starts around Thanksgiving, but this stretch between Christmas and New Year’s Day is particularly brutal — and it’s not just because I spent the first 48 years of my life in Southern California and still haven’t gotten used to the cold of the East Coast, but yes that. And it’s not just that I’ve lost both of my parents and Christmas has never been quite the same, but that’s part of it too. It’s more that I find it extraordinarily difficult just to be present. I feel caught between looking back on the previous 12 months and looking ahead to what I would like to do differently (or better) in the year ahead (but in all likelihood won’t, at least not to the degree that I tend to expect from myself). I suspect that I’m not alone in at least some of this. When I shared this with a friend, they responded, “Yeah, I feel the same way. But also the feeling and fear of the inevitable sameness as the previous year(s).” CONNECT WITH ME…

A few weeks ago, I took the train down to DC to meet up with my friend Richard Boutwell to walk through a show at the National Gallery called The '70s Lens. The show features the work of a bunch of fantastic photographers, many of whom I’d never heard of, and that was one of the reasons I wanted to go through it with him. Richard is a terrific photographer who specializes in western landscapes, mostly New Mexico, Arizona, and California. In fact, for years his grandfather was a park ranger in Joshua Tree, so he knows the park like the back of his hand. But as talented as he is behind the camera, he’s an even better printer. Richard has probably forgotten more about printing — both in the darkroom and digitally — than I will ever know. On top of that, he’s got an almost encyclopedic knowledge of photographers. As we were walking through the show, he was telling me all about this picture and that — why they are considered important, and in some cases, how the various photographers influenced each other’s work.…

Recently, I picked up a copy of Barry Lyndon on Blu-ray. It’s one of those movies that I’ve had on my watchlist forever, but for whatever reason it just kept slipping through the cracks. As I was researching some of the other Criterion movies I was thinking about picking up, I saw a story about Google’s new AI-integrated NotebookLM and decided to try an experiment to see what (if any) insights AI might have to offer around Barry Lyndon. The results were both exciting and a little terrifying. LINKS The Criterion Collection NotebookLM Technically awesome, emotionally distant — Kubrick movie review (1975) YouTube search results for "Barry Lyndon" Making Barry Lyndon How Kubrick Achieved the Beautiful Cinematography of Barry Lyndon Achieving Perfection - The Cinematography of Barry Lyndon Barry Lyndon - Stanley Kubrick's Meticulous Editing Process (Behind the Scenes) CONNECT WITH ME Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Instagram: @jefferysaddoris Email: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com

Saturday night, Adrianne and I spent the evening at the home of our neighbors Raj and Trupti helping them, along with about 60 other friends and family members, celebrate Diwali, which is the Hindu festival of lights. It’s hard to explain how incredible it felt not just to be invited into their home again, but to feel so welcomed by the other guests and to get the opportunity to participate in an event that is a deeply meaningful part of their culture. CONNECT WITH ME Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Instagram: @jefferysaddoris Email: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com SUBSCRIBE Subscribe to Almost Everything with Jeffery Saddoris in your favorite podcast app. You can also subscribe to my newsletter on Substack.

On Saturday, Adrianne and I took an impromptu trip into DC after seeing an interesting post pop up in my Instagram feed. The post was about an open studio event at the 52 O Street Artist Studios, which is a four-floor building that features “50+ Artists & Creative Businesses.” I’ve loved visiting artists’ spaces for years. When I was still living in California, I would regularly go to The Brewery Arts Complex for their open studio art walks, which were always fantastic. The Brewery is the largest live-work arts complex in the world, and for me the “live-work” aspect is really what sets it apart. There’s a similar complex in Alexandria, Virginia, called the Torpedo Factory that I also enjoy going to, but it’s a very different experience than The Brewery was. The artists only work at the Torpedo Factory and I think the fact that the artists at The Brewery work and live in the same space gives you a deeper insight into who they are beyond simply seeing the work. That additional context can make an enormous…

What you’re hearing (if you’re listening, rather than reading this) are the sounds of me unboxing a new keyboard — specifically, an Apple A1048, commonly known as simply the Apple Keyboard. What makes this keyboard especially interesting to me is the period of time in my life that it reminds me of — that and the fact that this particular keyboard has been sitting unopened and unused in a box in central California since 2003. I found it on shopgoodwill.com, where it was listed in “new or gently used” condition. When it arrived, I was pleasantly surprised to see that not only was it in the original box — which wasn’t mentioned in the description — but it was also in the original unopened plastic packaging. The last “new” thing I bought on Goodwill was a Starbucks Barista espresso machine to replace my Saeco Via Venezia that finally gave up the ghost after more than 19 years of daily service and literally thousands of shots of espresso. And just like the keyboard, the Barista was unopened and unused, still in…

Last week, I released a video review of a new book from Prestel about Gregory Crewdson. It was significant for me, not just because Gregory is one of my photographic heroes — although yes, that is part of it — but because it was the first project I’ve done in quite a while that was really just for me. I’ve been on a bit of a “creative hiatus” for the better part of a year and I’ve only done a few videos before this. So more than anything, I wanted to see if I could pull it off and have it be interesting and feel like me, rather than just another YouTube photo book flip-through. And before I get too far into this, I want to thank Andy Adams at FlakPhoto, without whom it may not have even happened. Andy is a good guy and if you’re at all interested in photography, he’s well worth a follow. A few months ago I started seeing a new therapist, and part of what we’ve been working on is something called Somatic Therapy, which I’ll include a couple links to in the notes if you’d like to learn more about it.…

Last week, I gave myself permission to do something that was a: pretty far outside of my comfort zone and b: completely unnecessary. If you read or listened to my last Iteration, you know I’ve been wanting an Elektron Digitakt for years, but would never allow myself to get one. Well, they say that fortune favors the bold, so I finally took the plunge and bought one. I had been lurking in the classified listings on Reverb for months, favoriting “mint” condition Digitakts, only to watch them sell to everyone but me. A couple weeks ago, a new listing popped up that caught my eye because the device appeared to be brand new. I reached out to the retailer — a music store in Tulsa — and asked about it. The owner got back to me the next day and said that it had never been taken out of the box, so I clicked the “Buy Now” button and eagerly awaited its arrival. WATCH THE VIDEO LINKS Elektron Reverb CONNECT WITH ME Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Instagram: @jefferysaddoris Email: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com…

Sunday was my birthday and as I begin my 58th trip around the sun, I’ve been reflecting on some of the things I’ve learned over the past half-century or so. I’m not talking about skills per se, though I have racked up a fairly impressive list. I think one of the things that has both helped the most while also being the most frustrating is the realization that in the vast majority of cases, control is an illusion. And when I say control, that could mean a job, our health, the art we make, almost anything — and a few things have happened recently that have really solidified that for me. CONNECT WITH ME Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Instagram: @jefferysaddoris Email: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com SUBSCRIBE Subscribe to Almost Everything with Jeffery Saddoris in your favorite podcast app. You can also subscribe to my newsletter on Substack.

I’ve been thinking about something for a while and I’m not sure whether or not it’ll land, but I’d like to try stringing together a few ideas. I think it’s time for us to embrace being self-centered, but not in the way that you might think. Typically, when we refer to someone as “self-centered” it’s not a compliment. It often refers to someone who is egotistical and only thinks about themselves or whose only concerns are their own wants, needs, or even interests. But I think there are ways we can reframe the idea of being self-centered as a positive instead of a negative. CONNECT WITH ME Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Instagram: @jefferysaddoris Email: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com SUBSCRIBE Subscribe to Almost Everything with Jeffery Saddoris in your favorite podcast app. You can also subscribe to my newsletter on Substack.

Whether you call it a slump, a funk, a downturn, a slowdown, a struggle, a breakdown, a nosedive, a stall, a meltdown, a plunge, or just stagnation, I’ve been in one for a while. While I have multiple journals that are dappled with notes, sketches, and the beginnings of ideas, I haven’t actually recorded a new show or finished a new painting in months. Even this newsletter has taken a hit on consistency after more than 130 weekly entries. I know the situation will come back online — or at least I believe that it will — but at the moment, my normally overflowing trough of creativity is experiencing a bit of a drought. And here’s the thing — I know that I’m not alone in feeling this way. I’ve talked with a number of people who are experiencing if not the same thing, something very similar — and it’s not just people who identify as “creatives.” There seems to be a common feeling that we’re on existentially shaky ground or in unfamiliar territory and we feel like even the few things we thought we had some…

For the past few weeks, maybe even the past month or so, I’ve been on sort of an Ethan Hawke deep dive. I like Ethan Hawke as an actor and while I haven’t seen everything he’s ever done, I really like Training Day and I would probably put Dead Poets Society and Gattaca in my top 20 — actually, maybe top 30. I know some people find him pretentious, but whenever I’ve seen him interviewed, he always seemed like a good guy. A few years ago, he did a TED Talk called Give Yourself Permission to be Creative that popped up in my feed recently, and watching it again reminded me how much I resonate with a lot of the same ideas he has about creativity. For example, one of the first things he says in the talk is “…a lot of people really struggle to give themselves permission to be creative, and reasonably so, we’re all a little suspect of our own talent.” I think we’ve all felt the same way at one point or another in our lives. I know I have. Whether it’s Imposter Syndrome or the nagging voice of Resistance,…

The other day I was on the phone with my friend Neale James and we were talking about a recent episode of his podcast The Photowalk, on which he was talking to our mutual friend Sean Tucker about creativity. “I invite you,” Neale begins the episode, “to imagine a five-pointed star. Now on each point of the star, I’d like you to think of a word that’s important to you in terms of creativity or your creativity. Each is a kind of cornerstone of the why and even how you create as of today.” As an aside, if you’re not listening to Neale’s show, you really should give it a try. Neale is a terrific host and his episodes are masterclasses in audio production and atmosphere. Anyway, as we were talking about his episode with Sean, he asked what the points on my creative star might be. On one hand, “why do you create?” is a deceptively simple question that many of us spend inordinate amounts of time wrestling with — at least I do. I think that Neale’s clever addition “as of today” gives us a little wiggle room and…

If you’ve been subscribed for a while, you probably know I’m a big Nine Inch Nails fan and have been since 1990 when I saw them open up for Peter Murphy. The other day, I was watching a terrific video with Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross breaking down some of their most iconic tracks. One of the more fascinating aspects of the video was how much Trent talks about process and how important the “feel” of the music was and still is. “When we write music,” Trent says, “it’s coming from a place where its main intent is to have you feel a certain way. It’s not coming from a love of melody and a joy of intricate chord progressions or technical wizardry.” I love this because he’s not just chasing easy likes or trying to impress the audience. Instead he’s focusing on how the work serves the overall project and on the relationship between the work and the audience. It’s not a “look at me” type of thing, like a gratuitous guitar solo or a vocalist who takes every opportunity to sing an unnecessary run. That’s not the…

Last week, we recorded the last episode of On Taking Pictures. If you’re a longtime listener, you may think you’ve heard this before, and you’re right, you have. But this time it’s different. I’ll get to why in a minute, but first I need to back up. In 2008, I was teaching Photoshop at Tri-Community Photo in Covina, California. One of the other instructors and I started doing photo walks with some of the students on the weekends. As they got more popular, we put up a simple web page called Faded & Blurred that had details about the upcoming walks. It pretty quickly evolved into a full-blown site, complete with a blog, spotlights on some of our favorite photographers, and a podcast called Q&A@F&B, which was a series of long-form conversations with photographers who were willing to sit down with me for an hour and talk about their work. In addition to getting to talk with photographers like John Keatley, David duChemin, and Ibarionex Perello, I also spoke with Bill Wadman for the first time. Bill and I hit it…

The artist Richard Serra died recently, and I know he’s considered a big deal in the art world, but honestly I’ve never really gotten what all the hype is about. I suppose I can appreciate the scale and the forms of some of the work in the same way that I can appreciate the architecture of Frank Gehry, but overall, it just never really grabbed me. Anyway, one of the posts that came up in my feed contained a quote by him that goes: “Art for the most part, is about concentration, solitude and determination. It's really not about other people's needs and assumptions. I'm not interested in the notion that art serves something. Art is useless, not useful.” LINKS Conversation with an Artist: Richard Serra Richard Serra - Talk with Charlie Rose (2001) Richard Serra on his Drawing (2011) If you enjoyed this Iteration, I would love it if you would share it with a friend or two. And if it resonated with you on some level, I’d love to know why. Email me at talkback@jefferysaddoris.com. CONNECT WITH ME Website:…

After recording last week’s episode of On Taking Pictures, Bill sent me a link to a video that’s both fascinating and deeply disturbing, called “AI vs Artists: The Biggest Art Heist in History.” The video presents some of the grim facts around how images, including the 5.85 billion uncurated images in the LAION-5B dataset, are being illegally scraped and used to generate derivative work. The dataset was initially intended for research but has since been made available commercially and has been used to train AI models, including MidJourney and Stable Diffusion. While it does contain images from the public domain, it also contains millions of copyrighted images, as well as explicit content. As they say in the video, no consent was obtained, nor were artists given the opportunity to opt in or opt out—and this is really at the core of why so many artists whose work has been stolen are so upset. LINKS Juxtapoz article Wolfe von Lenkiewicz AI algorithms Discussion on Threads Gagosian If you enjoyed this Iteration,…

About a week ago, I jumped back into using Photoshop for the first time since 2018 and I’ve got to tell you, it was kind of like putting on a favorite pair of jeans. Yes, the interface has changed a little and a bunch of terrific new tools have been added—especially Object Select, which I’ll come back to in a minute. But even after such a long hiatus, it was still so familiar that straight away it got me thinking about why I stopped using it, and in a broader sense, about some of the decisions we make around the tools we use. If you enjoyed this Iteration, I would love it if you would share it with a friend or two. And if it resonated with you on some level, I’d love to know why. Email me at talkback@jefferysaddoris.com. CONNECT WITH ME Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Instagram: @jefferysaddoris Email: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com SUBSCRIBE Subscribe to Almost Everything with Jeffery Saddoris in your favorite podcast app. You can also subscribe to my newsletter on Substack. MUSIC Music For Workplaces by…

I started this Iteration on February 29th—Leap Day—and for me it was a good day, which, frankly, I really needed. In the last Iteration, I talked about how difficult 2023 was for me and in the week or so since I shared it a lot has happened. Probably the biggest thing is that I’ve started going to therapy. I’ve danced around it for a long time and I think it just got to a point where I could no longer keep pretending that everything was okay—that I was okay— and that whatever was “wrong” with me, I could either fix it or just keep pushing it down. Neither of which is true, of course. If you enjoyed this Iteration, I would love it if you would share it with a friend or two. And if it resonated with you on some level, I’d love to know why. Email me at talkback@jefferysaddoris.com. CONNECT WITH ME Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Instagram: @jefferysaddoris Email: talkback@jefferysaddoris.com SUBSCRIBE Subscribe to Almost Everything with Jeffery Saddoris in your favorite podcast app. You can also subscribe…

I’m not going to bury the lede—2023 was not a great year for me, especially financially. In fact, I think it was one of the worst years I’ve had since I became a solo creative, and for the most part, it was nobody’s fault but mine. One of my favorite movies is High Fidelity (get the book here) and in it, there’s a scene where Rob (played by John Cusack) is going through a particularly frustrating time and says, “I’m sick of the sight of this place. Some days I'm afraid I'll go berserk, throw the "Country A through K" rack out on the street and go work at a Virgin Megastore and never come back.” I can definitely relate to that and it’s kind of where I was at the end of 2022. But I thought I would give it one more year to see whether I could come up with some new ideas and new work and maybe figure out a way to navigate the changing landscape of trying to eke out at least a partial living by being creative. And I know that phrase “being creative” is pretty loaded and it means different things to different…

Today is February 5th and it would have been my dad’s 83rd birthday. I normally mark the day by posting a simple message like “I miss you, Dad” on Instagram or Twitter, when Twitter was still a thing and I was still on it. Today, I want to do something a little different and tell you a story. My dad could be tough and for a big part of my adolescent life, we butted heads. A lot. At one point, it got pretty bad and we actually didn’t talk for a while. It seemed like we were often at odds with one another about something, but maybe that’s just how I need to remember it. When he got sick, we got another chance to get good and let all of the things that once seemed so important just melt away. As heartbreaking as it was to see him deteriorate like he did, I really am grateful for the time that it allowed us to spend together. We managed to get to a place where we respected each other, not just as men, but as father and son. We spent a lot of time on the front porch—often in silence. We watched a lot of westerns…

A couple weeks ago, I finally bought a set of wireless mics. I had been wanting and maybe even needing a set for a long time as a way to record the random conversations I seem to have with people out in the world on any given day. I’d been looking at them for a while, but I saw a review that Curtis Judd did—who was one of my favorite audio YouTubers—and I thought, “I'm just gonna get these. They'll be fine.” I had been going back-and-forth between the Røde Wireless Go IIs and the DJI Mics and then saw these Hollylands and thought, “You know what? I'm just gonna get them. The reviews are great (but specifically because I trusted Curtis).” So I bought them and they were just packaged so well and the design of the packaging was so well thought out—and borderline meticulous—that I decided I needed to do a video about it and talk about why those kinds of details are important—at least important to me. LINKS My video “unboxing” of the Hollyland Lark Max mics Hollyland Lark Max - 2-Person Wireless Microphone Curtis…

If you’ve spent any time around me at all, you know that I have opinions—lots of them—and I have since I was a kid. Sometimes when I would offer my unsolicited thoughts on various things, my mom would respond with “Oh, there he is…my little critic.” The thing is it’s not just criticism. Not always, anyway. More often than I generally care to admit, I find myself feeling personally offended, either by the design or functionality of a product or service or by someone—whether I know them or not—who simply doesn’t do something the way I think that it should be done. And to be clear, it’s not that I think that I’m better as much as I think that the way I do certain things is. I’m not right all the time and I have no problem admitting that. But when I am and I think that you’re not, I’ll happily tell you. I think it’s something I inherited from my dad—or maybe it’s a trait of undiagnosed neurodivergence. Either way, while I think I’ve gotten better about not being so critical (at least publicly), letting go of the…

Well here we are again, nearing the end of one more trip around the sun and I for one cannot wait for it to be over. Christmas used to be my favorite time of year, but that was really because of my mom. She would start decorating the house around Thanksgiving, and when I say decorating, I don’t just mean putting up lights—our house looked and smelled like a Hallmark store. Yes, there were lights, but she also had all sorts of ornaments, figurines, and little holiday town squares and villages. She wrapped or swagged garland everywhere she could, displayed her favorite Christmas cards from years past, and sometimes you could barely see the actual Christmas tree because it was absolutely covered with lights, decorations, and tinsel. Lots of tinsel. CONNECT WITH ME Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Instagram: @jefferysaddoris SUBSCRIBE Subscribe to Almost Everything with Jeffery Saddoris in your favorite podcast app. MUSIC Music For Workplaces by Jeffery Saddoris

Back in the late 70s, there was a terrific documentary on the BBC called Connections. It was hosted by historian and author James Burke and now that I think about it, I don’t remember whether I watched it on PBS or I borrowed VHS copies of it from my freshman English teacher, Mrs. Copeland who also loaned out copies of Cosmos. And to be clear, I’m talking about the Carl Sagan version, not the Neil Degrasse Tyson version. Regardless, the show was all about tracing the connections between things that on the surface share nothing in common. I found it fascinating and I think it inspired me to start looking deeper at the world around me to try to see how things might be related. CONNECT WITH ME Website: https://jefferysaddoris.com Instagram: @jefferysaddoris MUSIC Music For Workplaces by Jeffery Saddoris

As we get into this Iteration, I’d like to take a minute to let you know about some changes that I’m working on that will be rolling out in the coming weeks and months. Iterations will still be weekly (mostly), but I’m going to mix up the types of posts I’ll be including and treat it more like an old-school blog. For example, you may have noticed that the Blips have been getting more substantial in terms of the research I do and the number of links I include. They started out as a just few links to things that I saw or found interesting during the previous week and have been evolving into something more comprehensive and hopefully more interesting and inspiring for you. Moving forward, they’ll still be part of their own section on Substack, but I’m going to lose the word “Blip” and the number in the naming convention of the titles to alleviate any potential confusion that comes with having Blip number 47 alongside Iteration number 124. I’m also going to be adding reviews into the mix—and that could mean…